Can We Invite Our Non-Jewish Friends to a Jewish Wedding — Will They Understand It?

A real story of love, inclusion, and the beauty of Jewish wedding traditions

By Cantor Ben

When Amy and Tommy first reached out to me about officiating their Jewish wedding in Toronto, one of their biggest questions wasn’t about the chuppah or the ketubah. It was this: Can we invite our non-Jewish friends and will they understand what’s happening? Will it feel meaningful to them too?

Their question was deeply sincere. Like many modern Jewish couples in Toronto, Amy and Tommy had a beautifully diverse circle of friends. Some were Jewish, some weren’t. Some had never attended a Jewish wedding ceremony before. And as they shared with me during our first meeting over coffee, they didn’t want anyone feeling like an outsider.

This is where my approach as a Jewish wedding officiant truly comes in.

I explained to Amy and Tommy that every element I do in Hebrew, I also do in English. Every blessing, every explanation, every symbolic moment is made crystal clear. Not only that, I bring a warm energy to each moment of the ceremony so that everyone feels like they are part of something sacred, joyous, and universally human.

Why Non-Jewish Guests Love Jewish Weddings

What makes a Jewish wedding Toronto style so unforgettable isn’t just the hora or the smashing of the glass. It’s that the rituals are full of meaning, and when those meanings are explained with care, they land on the heart regardless of your background.

At Amy and Tommy’s wedding, we began under the chuppah with a short welcome to the guests. I explained that the chuppah, open on all sides, represents the home the couple will build together — one that is open to friends, family, and community. I don’t assume everyone there knows what a chuppah is or what it symbolizes. I make it easy and warm for everyone to follow.

Then came the ketubah signing, and again, I walked guests through what it meant. It’s more than just a Jewish wedding tradition — it’s a sacred promise between two people. Even guests unfamiliar with Jewish wedding customs found themselves moved by how rooted in love and responsibility this moment was.

Creating a Ceremony That Speaks to All

Amy and Tommy chose to blend elements of traditional Jewish weddings and modern Jewish weddings. They wanted Jewish wedding music that was classic but also upbeat. Their Jewish wedding venue was outdoors, surrounded by trees and twinkling lights. And they selected Jewish wedding decorations that honored their heritage but didn’t feel overwhelming.

As a Jewish wedding cantor who was mentored by a great Jewish wedding Rabbi, I’ve learned the art of balancing Jewish wedding rituals with a modern, joyful tone that invites every guest in.

At their ceremony, I guided everyone through the Seven Blessings — first in Hebrew, then in English. Each blessing was introduced with a brief explanation and connected to something universal: love, growth, joy, peace. I kept the energy light and heartfelt. I made eye contact with the guests. And I reminded them — this isn’t a performance, this is a celebration of love, and you’re part of it.

A Jewish Wedding Officiant Who Builds Connection

As a cantor and Jewish wedding officiant in Toronto, I believe that every wedding is an opportunity to build bridges. Jewish wedding celebrations don’t exclude — they embrace. And when done with care and intention, Jewish wedding vows, Jewish wedding dances, and the traditions around them can touch every heart in the room.

We ended the ceremony with the Jewish wedding hora, lifting Amy and Tommy on chairs surrounded by clapping and laughter. Guests who had never danced a hora before joined in and told me afterward how welcome they felt.

A few weeks later, Amy texted me and said, “Even our non-Jewish friends told us this was the most personal, beautiful wedding they’ve ever attended. They loved every part of it.”

That is what it means to create a Jewish wedding ceremony that truly includes.

What About When Baby Comes Along?

About a year after their wedding, Amy and Tommy reached out again. This time, it was to ask about planning a baby naming ceremony.

“We want it to feel just as special as our wedding,” they said.

And so we began preparing for a Jewish newborn ceremony that would welcome their daughter into the world. As with the wedding, I offered guidance on Jewish baby naming services that could be personal and meaningful — not just for them, but for grandparents, cousins, and yes, non-Jewish friends attending the celebration.

From the baby naming invitation to the music, to the blessings, I made sure their Jewish baby naming tradition reflected their values and their story.

At the Jewish baby naming ceremony, I explained the meaning behind their daughter’s Hebrew name. I guided everyone through the Jewish baby naming rituals in both Hebrew and English. And I included a moment where friends and family could share their hopes and blessings aloud.

It was more than just a Jewish baby naming reception. It was a celebration of legacy, belonging, and community.

Final Thoughts

Amy and Tommy’s journey is one I’ve seen echoed in many couples I work with. They wanted a Jewish wedding ceremony that reflected their identity, honored their traditions, and made every guest feel seen. And later, they wanted a Jewish newborn ceremony that offered the same values of warmth, meaning, and connection.

If you’re planning your own wedding and wondering if your non-Jewish friends will feel comfortable, the answer is yes — if you have the right officiant.

A Jewish wedding cantor who understands how to craft a ceremony that is both sacred and accessible can make all the difference. I bring not just experience, but care, warmth, and intention to every couple I work with.

Whether you’re looking for Jewish wedding planning guidance, a Jewish wedding photographer who understands the flow of rituals, or help designing Jewish wedding invitations that reflect your vision — I’m here to help.

And when the time comes, I would be honored to help you plan a Jewish baby naming celebration that welcomes your little one into the world with joy, meaning, and tradition.

Your story is unique. Your ceremony should be too.

If you’re ready to start planning your Jewish wedding Toronto style — filled with love, symbolism, and unforgettable memories — I’d love to talk.

Let’s create something beautiful together.