What Does a Jewish Wedding Officiant Actually Do — and How Do I Choose the Right One?

When I first sat down with Zoe and Tommy, a thoughtful couple from Toronto planning their Jewish wedding, they had a lot of questions.

They had already chosen a beautiful Jewish wedding venue overlooking the city skyline. Their families were thrilled, their guest list was shaping up, and Zoe had even found her dream Jewish wedding attire. But they were stuck on one thing:

“We’re not members of a synagogue,” Zoe said. “We’re spiritual but not super religious. We don’t want a cookie-cutter ceremony. What exactly does a Jewish wedding officiant do… and how do we choose someone who really gets us?”

This is a question more and more couples are asking. And as someone who has helped hundreds of couples in Toronto create deeply meaningful, personalized ceremonies, I want to give you the full picture of what a Jewish wedding officiant truly does — and how to find the right one for you.

The Jewish Wedding Officiant: More Than Just a Ceremony Leader

A Jewish wedding officiant is so much more than someone who recites a few blessings and makes it official. When you choose the right person, they become a guide, a storyteller, and a spiritual anchor during one of the most sacred and emotional moments of your life.

I’m Cantor Ben, a Jewish wedding cantor based in Toronto. I am not a Rabbi — and that’s an important distinction — but I was mentored by a great Jewish wedding Rabbi who taught me the power and purpose behind every element of the Jewish wedding ceremony.

My role is to help couples like Zoe and Tommy create a ceremony that is:

• Deeply rooted in Jewish wedding traditions and Jewish wedding rituals

• Reflective of who you are as individuals and as a couple

• Emotionally moving, musically rich, and authentically yours

Whether you are planning a traditional Jewish wedding or a more modern ceremony, I guide you every step of the way. From your first planning session to the moment you step under the chuppah, I am there with you, supporting your vision.

Zoe and Tommy’s Wedding: Warm, Personal, and Deeply Jewish

When Zoe and Tommy told me about their love story, I knew this was going to be a beautiful ceremony.

They had met at a Jewish music festival and bonded over a shared love of spirituality, family, and laughter. While they appreciated tradition, they also wanted their wedding to feel warm, relaxed, and completely true to who they are.

In our first planning meeting, we explored every element of the Jewish wedding ceremony. We talked about the meaning behind the Ketubah, the symbolism of the chuppah, the emotion of the seven blessings, and the energy of the Jewish wedding dance and hora.

Together, we shaped a ceremony that honored both Jewish wedding customs and their personal love story. Zoe and Tommy each wrote their own Jewish wedding vows, filled with humor, gratitude, and heartfelt commitment. The moment they shared those words under the canopy brought tears to nearly every eye in the crowd.

Their Jewish wedding music included a blend of traditional melodies and a surprise rendition of their favorite folk song as they walked down the aisle. Their Jewish wedding photographer captured every small, sacred moment — from the signing of the Jewish wedding Ketubah to the joyful celebration at the Jewish wedding reception.

Their day was filled with intentionality, beauty, and joy. It was, in every way, a perfect example of how a modern Jewish wedding can hold fast to tradition while also expressing individuality.

How to Choose the Right Jewish Wedding Officiant

So how do you find the right Jewish wedding officiant for your ceremony?

Here are the three things I tell every couple to look for:

1. Connection

Your officiant should take the time to get to know you — really know you. They should ask about your relationship, your values, your families, and your hopes for the future. A great ceremony is personal. It should never feel generic.

2. Flexibility

Look for someone who is comfortable with modern Jewish weddings as well as traditional Jewish weddings. Maybe you want to include family members in your ceremony. Maybe you want to blend Jewish and secular readings. Maybe you want to skip certain customs. A good officiant will guide you without judgment.

3. Experience and Presence

Your officiant should understand the Jewish wedding planning process, be calm under pressure, and have experience leading sacred moments. They should bring a calming presence and a voice that resonates — both literally and emotionally.

Beyond the Wedding: The Journey Continues

Several months after their ceremony, Zoe and Tommy reached out again.

They had just welcomed a baby girl into the world, and they wanted me to officiate her Jewish baby naming ceremony.

It was a joy to work with them again, this time in a different sacred context. Their Jewish newborn ceremony was small, gentle, and full of meaning. We incorporated Jewish baby naming traditions and blessings for health, wisdom, and joy.

We prepared Jewish baby naming invitations, selected soft instrumental Jewish baby naming ceremony music, and held the event at home with their closest family and friends.

As their Jewish baby naming officiant, I helped them craft a Jewish baby naming celebration that was personal and memorable. From the readings to the ritual blessings to the delicious spread at their Jewish baby naming reception, everything reflected the same warmth and authenticity they had brought to their wedding.

Moments like this remind me that being a Jewish wedding cantor is not just about one day. It’s about supporting families through life’s most sacred transitions.

Your Ceremony. Your Story. Your Traditions.

Choosing the right Jewish wedding officiant means choosing someone who sees your ceremony not just as an event — but as a sacred, once-in-a-lifetime moment.

Whether you are planning a Jewish wedding in Toronto, looking for a unique Jewish wedding cantor, or dreaming of a ceremony that blends ancient beauty with modern meaning, I would be honored to guide you.

Together, we can create a ceremony that honors Jewish wedding traditions, reflects your values, and leaves your guests inspired and uplifted.

Here is my question for you:

When you look back on your wedding, what do you want to remember most about your ceremony?

If your answer is connection, authenticity, and meaning — let’s talk.

Your wedding should tell your story. I would be honored to help you tell it.