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How Melissa and Tommy Used Jewish Wedding Wisdom to Build a Marriage That Lasts

Let’s be honest—most people fear judgment more than failure.

Why?

Because deep down, they think judgment equals rejection. That feedback somehow means they’re not good enough, that criticism is a sign they should give up.



But here’s the truth I teach every student—and every couple I work with:


Feedback doesn’t define you—it refines you.

It’s not an attack on your worth. It’s a mirror. A gift. A chance to grow into the leader, partner, and person you’re meant to be.

How Melissa and Tommy Built a Marriage—and a Mindset—on Growth


When I officiated the Jewish Wedding Ceremony for Melissa and Tommy in Toronto, they showed a powerful example of this lesson in action.


Melissa and Tommy came to me wanting a Jewish Wedding Toronto families would remember: full of meaning, tradition, love, and joy. But during our planning sessions—whether it was reviewing the Jewish Wedding Traditions they wanted to honor, choosing the perfect Jewish Wedding Venue, or practicing their Jewish Wedding Vows under the Jewish Wedding Chuppah—they were incredibly open to feedback.


They didn’t just want the easiest ceremony.


They wanted the strongest marriage foundation.


When I suggested small adjustments to their Jewish Wedding Rituals to make them more personal, or tips for their Jewish Wedding Ketubah signing to be more meaningful, they didn’t resist.

They leaned in.

They didn’t see feedback as criticism—they saw it as an opportunity to make their wedding, and their relationship, even stronger.


That’s the secret.


That’s the mindset I help cultivate whether it’s in my Jewish Wedding Services, or in helping teens through CoolCantor programs.


The Power of Being Coachable (In Marriage and in Life)


There’s a secret every great leader—and every strong couple—knows:

Success doesn’t come from knowing everything. It comes from being willing to learn anything.


When someone gives you advice or constructive feedback, and your instinct is to defend yourself? That’s ego talking.

But when your instinct is to say:


“Thank you—how can we improve?”

That’s maturity. That’s partnership. That’s leadership.


When Melissa and Tommy embraced that mindset, their Jewish Wedding Reception was filled with genuine laughter, warmth, and deep connection. Their ability to listen, adjust, and grow during the process created not just an incredible Jewish Wedding Celebration—but a stronger bond between them.


And this is true far beyond weddings.

It’s true in Jewish Baby Naming Ceremonies, where families trust me to create a Jewish Newborn Ceremony rich with meaning.

It’s true in marriage.

It’s true in life.

Action Steps: Rewire Your Response to Feedback


Here’s how I teach people—whether in my Life Coaching programs, Bar Mitzvah Training, or in Jewish Wedding Planning—to embrace feedback as fuel:


1. Expect Feedback—Don’t Fear It.

Before you enter any situation—a Jewish Wedding Planning meeting, an Online Hebrew School lesson, a tough conversation—tell yourself:


“I’m not here to be perfect. I’m here to grow.”


2. Replace Defense With Curiosity.

If someone offers a suggestion for your Jewish Wedding Decorations, your Jewish Wedding Music, or your Bar Mitzvah Speech, pause. Breathe.

Respond with:


“Thanks for the feedback—can you tell me more?”


3. Build a ‘Feedback Habit.’

Make it normal to ask for one piece of advice each week—from a mentor, a friend, a coach.

Growth becomes a habit when you seek feedback regularly.


4. Reflect, Don’t Ruminate.

After feedback, don’t spiral into self-doubt.

Instead, reflect:

• What did I learn?

• What will I try differently next time?

• What went well?


The same way Melissa and Tommy reflected on every piece of input during their Jewish Wedding Toronto journey, you can turn every critique into momentum.

How This Connects to Everything I Teach


Whether I’m guiding a teen through Online Bar Mitzvah Lessons, helping an adult rediscover their Jewish identity through an Adult Bar Mitzvah, or planning a beautiful Jewish Wedding Ceremony—my approach is the same:


Growth comes through humility.

Success comes through coachability.

Confidence comes from embracing—not avoiding—feedback.


The same is true when you plan a Jewish Wedding Celebration, a Jewish Baby Naming Ceremony Jewish families treasure, or any milestone:

The people who listen, who stay open, who stay coachable—are the ones who create something unforgettable.

Final Reflection


People who run from feedback stay stuck.

People who chase perfection burn out.

But people like Melissa and Tommy—people who chase growth?

They build strong marriages, strong families, and strong futures.


So ask yourself:


What’s one piece of feedback you’ve received recently, and how did you respond to it?

If you could go back and handle it again, what would you do differently?


Because growth doesn’t come from standing still.

It comes from moving forward—with humility, with courage, and with an open heart.


And when you do that—you don’t just impress people.

You inspire them.

 
 
 

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